Monday Nov. 21st 6:00-6:30AM
Tuesday Nov. 22nd 6:00-6:30AM
Wednesday Nov. 23rd 6:30-7:00AM
Parenting With Love And Logic By Foster Cline, M.D. & Jim Fay
This week I was able to get through Pearls 27-36. Pearl 31 talks about spanking. This pearl says that kids would rather have a spanking and a brief moment of pain and so they can be off the hook. Children need to think about what they have done wrong and live with the consequences and think about solutions. There are five good reasons to avoid spanking:
1. Empathy and logic consequences are far more powerful than spanking, because they teach problem solving skills.
2. Spanking fails to teach the behaviors we want.
3. Most kids would rather receive a spanking than have to think about their poor choice.
4. More recent research tells us that spanking has many negative side effects, such as anger, resentment, revenge, etc.
5. Our kids may someday choose our nursing homes.
I also really liked Pearl 35, Teeth Brushing. I have a 3 and 5 year old daughters and teeth brushing is always a struggle with us at our house. One thing the book talks about is to talk with your spouse in ear shot of the kids such as after dinner the dad may say to his wife: "I sure can't go through the rest of the day with all that sugar on my teeth and in my mouth. I'd better go take care of it so I won't have cavities." When he returns from brushing he tells his wife "I'm sure glad I did that. It only took a couple of minutes to get the job done, and I feel a whole lot better." With doing this kids can thus model what we say as well as how we feel after we've done it.
I really think that this is a good idea. I think that I will try this with my husband while we are still sitting at the table after we have finished our dinner. This way my girls can hear that I am going to brush my teeth. I think that I could also brush my teeth with my girls of an evening even if my husband and I didn't have a conversation in front of the girls about it. Maybe if I am going to brush my teeth then it will help my girls want to brush their teeth too.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Week Seven
Mon Nov. 14th 6-6:30AM
Tuesday Nov. 15th 10-10:15AM
Thursday Nov. 17th 2:15-2:45PM
Saturday Nov. 19th 6:50-7:15PM
Parenting Magazine Isssue 259 Dec/Jan 2012
Parenting With Love And Logic By Foster Cline, M.D. & Jim Fay
In the Parenting magazine I didn't make it all the way through it and it seems like most of their big articles are in the back half of the magazine. So I really didn't get to any of those. I just read some of the little articles that are half to a whole page. I really just enjoy looking at the cute clothes trend for the little toddlers and looking at all the new gadgets that are out. Parenting magazine is always giving away items so I like to see what is up for free this month!
One little article that I read was titled My New Happy Meal By Ana Connery. It was her son's 6th birthday and at his party was Ana (mom) her ex-husband (dad) along with Ana's parents and Ana's boyfriend. She talked about how it was kind of awkward at first but throughout the party eveyone loosened up and it turned out to be a great time. I think it said that Ana and her ex had been divorced for like 4 years so it wasn't anything recent. But her point or the "Big Idea" was that family is just a group of people who have your back, love you unconditionally, and are willing tobe a little uncomfortable if it means making you happy.
Parenting With Love And Logic I got through Pearl 19 to Pearl 26. These seven Pearls were Homework, "I'm Bored" Routine, Lying And Dishonesty, Nasty Looks And Negative Body Language, Peer Presssure, Pet Care, Picking Up Belongings, & Professional Help: When To Seek It. The one that I really liked was Pearl 25 Picking Up Belongings. It said that children from Kindergarten on should be able to be responsible for their own toys. If they toys are in their room then that is their problem but if they are all over they living room then it needs to be picked up. The mother told her son that he had a lot of his things laying around in the living room and it is kind of getting in the way. She asked him if he wanted to pick it up or if he wanted her to pick it up. The son of course wanted his mom to pick it up. She said that the advantage to him picking it up is that he'll get to see it again because if she picked it up he wouldn't see it again. She told him to think about it and at lunch time if the items were still on the floor then she knew that he wanted her to pick them up but if they weren't on the floor then she knew that he still wanted his toys and that he cleaned it up.
Everytime I read this book I am getting more and more ideas of how to handle my daughters which I believe it also will help me with my students when I begin to teach. I am learning that they need to be able to make more of their own choices and be able to fail a few times so they can learn from it.
Tuesday Nov. 15th 10-10:15AM
Thursday Nov. 17th 2:15-2:45PM
Saturday Nov. 19th 6:50-7:15PM
Parenting Magazine Isssue 259 Dec/Jan 2012
Parenting With Love And Logic By Foster Cline, M.D. & Jim Fay
In the Parenting magazine I didn't make it all the way through it and it seems like most of their big articles are in the back half of the magazine. So I really didn't get to any of those. I just read some of the little articles that are half to a whole page. I really just enjoy looking at the cute clothes trend for the little toddlers and looking at all the new gadgets that are out. Parenting magazine is always giving away items so I like to see what is up for free this month!
One little article that I read was titled My New Happy Meal By Ana Connery. It was her son's 6th birthday and at his party was Ana (mom) her ex-husband (dad) along with Ana's parents and Ana's boyfriend. She talked about how it was kind of awkward at first but throughout the party eveyone loosened up and it turned out to be a great time. I think it said that Ana and her ex had been divorced for like 4 years so it wasn't anything recent. But her point or the "Big Idea" was that family is just a group of people who have your back, love you unconditionally, and are willing tobe a little uncomfortable if it means making you happy.
Parenting With Love And Logic I got through Pearl 19 to Pearl 26. These seven Pearls were Homework, "I'm Bored" Routine, Lying And Dishonesty, Nasty Looks And Negative Body Language, Peer Presssure, Pet Care, Picking Up Belongings, & Professional Help: When To Seek It. The one that I really liked was Pearl 25 Picking Up Belongings. It said that children from Kindergarten on should be able to be responsible for their own toys. If they toys are in their room then that is their problem but if they are all over they living room then it needs to be picked up. The mother told her son that he had a lot of his things laying around in the living room and it is kind of getting in the way. She asked him if he wanted to pick it up or if he wanted her to pick it up. The son of course wanted his mom to pick it up. She said that the advantage to him picking it up is that he'll get to see it again because if she picked it up he wouldn't see it again. She told him to think about it and at lunch time if the items were still on the floor then she knew that he wanted her to pick them up but if they weren't on the floor then she knew that he still wanted his toys and that he cleaned it up.
Everytime I read this book I am getting more and more ideas of how to handle my daughters which I believe it also will help me with my students when I begin to teach. I am learning that they need to be able to make more of their own choices and be able to fail a few times so they can learn from it.
Week Six
Monday Nov. 7th 6-6:30AM
Wednesday Nov 9th 6-6:30AM
Friday Nov. 11th 6-6:30AM
I have been doing a bootcamp on Mon, Wed, and Fri mornings from 5-5:45. So as soon as I get home I have 30 minutes before I need to get into the shower. I have found that this is a good quite time for me to get my reading done.
Parenting With Love And Logic By Foster Cline, M.D. & Jim Fay
This week I read from Pearl 10 to Pearl 18. Some of the things talked about don't really pertain to me and my daughters such as: Divorce And Visitation, Grades And Report Cards, or Friends. My girls are still too young for us to be having issues with some of these problems. I am sure that eventually it will happen with the grade cards and the friends and so I hope that I can remember what the book suggest to do!
One that I read that does fit in with our life right now is Pearl 13 Eating And Table Manners. They gave an example of kids not liking what was for dinner so mom picked up their plates and dumped their food in the trash and told them to go play and that they will see them at breakfast. Later the kids got some food out of the refrigerator because they were hungry. Mom waited until they were done and then she told them that they just ate $1.95 worth of food and how would they like to pay for that with cash or from their allowance. Because you see mom had already made them dinner and because they chose not to eat what she cooked the kids just wasted that dinner just to eat more of moms snack food that cost mom more money.
I did try something like this myself this evening with my 3yr old. She didn't want to eat what we were eating so I just pushed her food back and told her that she can eat this now or she can wait and eat breakfast in the morning but this is what we are having for dinner and I am not fixing anything else. At first she said that she will wait till breakfast but as she sat there she then decided that she would eat now with the rest of us. I just don't know if I could throw the kids food away at first. Because I know, just like my 3yr old did, they will change their minds and want it.
Another Pearl that I can kind of relate to right now is Pearl 16 Getting Ready For School. I have a kindergartners and we aren't really having a hard time getting her ready for school in the morning but it is that she isn't wanting to go to school. She actually gets dressed and things just fine but the closer it gets to leaving the house the slower she goes and the tears begin to fall. In this section the mom was always late for work because of her son. Finally one evening mom told her son that she will not be late for work tomorrow morning and that he better be ready for school when its time to go. That next morning her some wasn't ready so she had a bag with his clothes in it and she took him to school in his PJ's. Now the teacher wouldn't let him in the class until he changes. So he could either sit in the hall all day in PJ's or change and join the class. Mom was never late to work again after that.
Some of these "rules" seem so drastic that I am not for sure if I can follow them but I believe that they can work so if I ever have to take some of these drastic measures I sure hope I will follow through with it.
Wednesday Nov 9th 6-6:30AM
Friday Nov. 11th 6-6:30AM
I have been doing a bootcamp on Mon, Wed, and Fri mornings from 5-5:45. So as soon as I get home I have 30 minutes before I need to get into the shower. I have found that this is a good quite time for me to get my reading done.
Parenting With Love And Logic By Foster Cline, M.D. & Jim Fay
This week I read from Pearl 10 to Pearl 18. Some of the things talked about don't really pertain to me and my daughters such as: Divorce And Visitation, Grades And Report Cards, or Friends. My girls are still too young for us to be having issues with some of these problems. I am sure that eventually it will happen with the grade cards and the friends and so I hope that I can remember what the book suggest to do!
One that I read that does fit in with our life right now is Pearl 13 Eating And Table Manners. They gave an example of kids not liking what was for dinner so mom picked up their plates and dumped their food in the trash and told them to go play and that they will see them at breakfast. Later the kids got some food out of the refrigerator because they were hungry. Mom waited until they were done and then she told them that they just ate $1.95 worth of food and how would they like to pay for that with cash or from their allowance. Because you see mom had already made them dinner and because they chose not to eat what she cooked the kids just wasted that dinner just to eat more of moms snack food that cost mom more money.
I did try something like this myself this evening with my 3yr old. She didn't want to eat what we were eating so I just pushed her food back and told her that she can eat this now or she can wait and eat breakfast in the morning but this is what we are having for dinner and I am not fixing anything else. At first she said that she will wait till breakfast but as she sat there she then decided that she would eat now with the rest of us. I just don't know if I could throw the kids food away at first. Because I know, just like my 3yr old did, they will change their minds and want it.
Another Pearl that I can kind of relate to right now is Pearl 16 Getting Ready For School. I have a kindergartners and we aren't really having a hard time getting her ready for school in the morning but it is that she isn't wanting to go to school. She actually gets dressed and things just fine but the closer it gets to leaving the house the slower she goes and the tears begin to fall. In this section the mom was always late for work because of her son. Finally one evening mom told her son that she will not be late for work tomorrow morning and that he better be ready for school when its time to go. That next morning her some wasn't ready so she had a bag with his clothes in it and she took him to school in his PJ's. Now the teacher wouldn't let him in the class until he changes. So he could either sit in the hall all day in PJ's or change and join the class. Mom was never late to work again after that.
Some of these "rules" seem so drastic that I am not for sure if I can follow them but I believe that they can work so if I ever have to take some of these drastic measures I sure hope I will follow through with it.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Week Five
Parenting With Love And Logic Teaching Children Responsibility By Foster Cline, M.D. & Jim Fay
Tuesday Nov 1st 10:23-10:38AM, 2:15-2:45PM
Wednesday Nov 2nd 6:00-6:30AM 10:18-10:38AM
In this week I continued reading about the forty pearls. I read Pearl 4 through Pearl 9 this week.
Pearl 4 talked about bossiness. They say to handle our children that become bossy to us is to have a good one-liner or two ready for immediate use. We just need to smile at them and tell them nice try and what do you think happens in our family when people get really bossy and not to answer that now and to just think about it.
Pearl 5 is over the back-seat battles in the car. Basically they say for older kids is to tell them that the parent driving cannot focus on the driving and that maybe the kids need to get some air so we need to pull over. Tell the kids to get out and that you will be waiting for them up the road and maybe by the time the kids get there they will be feeling better. Of course the kids will just be in shock.
Pearl 6 is about chores. Parents need to show the kids that doing chorse is fun and to have a good attitude while doing them. Parents need to include the children when dividing up the chores. Let the children pick which ones they would like to do this week. That way they cannot complain of the chores being unfair.
Pearl 7 talks about when kids don't want to go to church. Parents need to make genuine statements that the children can hear like "I 'm sure glad I have my church. I enjoy my friends and always get such needed encouragement." Kids sometimes get bored because they have heard the same story over and over. So we need to encourage the kids.
Pearl 8 is crisis situations. It teaches us that first crises are generally temporary and second, almost no crisis must be dealt with immediately. Sometimes what we think is a crisis really isn't. Just doing something isn't always the right answer sometimes we need to take time and think about what they right thing is to do.
Pearl 9 is about discipline in public - strategic training session. Kids think their parents don't dare do anything to them because they are out in public. So when our children act up the book suggest to ask the child if they would rather go to their room instead of shop. The child doesn't believe that you will drive all the way back home but that is when you call your spouse or friend (because you have already given them a heads up that you might call) to come get your child and take them to their room until you are done shopping. You could also do this with going to the car instead of all the way home.
Tuesday Nov 1st 10:23-10:38AM, 2:15-2:45PM
Wednesday Nov 2nd 6:00-6:30AM 10:18-10:38AM
In this week I continued reading about the forty pearls. I read Pearl 4 through Pearl 9 this week.
Pearl 4 talked about bossiness. They say to handle our children that become bossy to us is to have a good one-liner or two ready for immediate use. We just need to smile at them and tell them nice try and what do you think happens in our family when people get really bossy and not to answer that now and to just think about it.
Pearl 5 is over the back-seat battles in the car. Basically they say for older kids is to tell them that the parent driving cannot focus on the driving and that maybe the kids need to get some air so we need to pull over. Tell the kids to get out and that you will be waiting for them up the road and maybe by the time the kids get there they will be feeling better. Of course the kids will just be in shock.
Pearl 6 is about chores. Parents need to show the kids that doing chorse is fun and to have a good attitude while doing them. Parents need to include the children when dividing up the chores. Let the children pick which ones they would like to do this week. That way they cannot complain of the chores being unfair.
Pearl 7 talks about when kids don't want to go to church. Parents need to make genuine statements that the children can hear like "I 'm sure glad I have my church. I enjoy my friends and always get such needed encouragement." Kids sometimes get bored because they have heard the same story over and over. So we need to encourage the kids.
Pearl 8 is crisis situations. It teaches us that first crises are generally temporary and second, almost no crisis must be dealt with immediately. Sometimes what we think is a crisis really isn't. Just doing something isn't always the right answer sometimes we need to take time and think about what they right thing is to do.
Pearl 9 is about discipline in public - strategic training session. Kids think their parents don't dare do anything to them because they are out in public. So when our children act up the book suggest to ask the child if they would rather go to their room instead of shop. The child doesn't believe that you will drive all the way back home but that is when you call your spouse or friend (because you have already given them a heads up that you might call) to come get your child and take them to their room until you are done shopping. You could also do this with going to the car instead of all the way home.
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